Being single in my 40s didn't stop me; I embraced motherhood through IVF, says Bhavana Ramanna

Fulfilling a deeply felt desire to be a mother, actress and dancer Bhavana Ramanna is six months pregnant with twins, conceived through IVF as a single woman in her 40s. “I grew up in a home that was always full — parents, three siblings, and a steady stream of relatives and friends. I always loved being around kids, but the thought of having my own never took root in my twenties. In my thirties, I was ready for love, but even then, motherhood wasn’t something I considered. It was only when I turned 40 that the call to become a mother became impossible to ignore. I’ve now fulfilled that deeply felt desire — I’m six months pregnant and expecting twins later this year,” says Bhavana. In a candid chat, she opens up about her journey with assisted reproduction, the societal biases faced by single mothers, and her plans for her children’s future. Excerpts:‘MANY IVF DOCTORS SIMPLY HUNG UP THE MOMENT THEY LEARNED I WAS SINGLE AND UNMARRIED’ Bhavana tells us that her first choice was to become a mother the conventional way. “Since marriage and I never crossed paths, I had to look at other possibilities — including assisted reproduction,” she says. “For the longest time, the law didn’t support single or unwed women opting for motherhood through these means. But once the legal framework shifted to be more inclusive, I knew it was time. I began reaching out to IVF clinics — and encountered resistance. Many doctors simply hung up the moment they learned I was single and unmarried. It was only a few months ago that I found a clinic close to home. I walked in, chose a donor, and began treatment. My doctor has been incredibly supportive and has held my hand through every step of the journey. I was fortunate: it worked in the very first attempt. I remember coming home and telling my father I had begun IVF treatment. He was overjoyed. He said, ‘You’re a woman — and you have every right to become a mother.’ My siblings rallied around me, offering unwavering support. That kind of community is vital for any single mother. Of course, there have been a few who questioned my choice, asked if this was the right path. I told them, simply and clearly: I couldn’t be more sure,” she states.‘SOON, I WILL HAVE TWO LITTLE SOULS WHO WILL CALL ME AMMA’ Looking ahead, Bhavana says she has prepared for every aspect of raising her children as a single mother, drawing strength from her upbringing. “I’ve thought about my children’s future — and I’m prepared; My parents raised us to be independent thinkers, and their world views have always been progressive. My late mother would have been the happiest about this pregnancy — I carry that thought with me every day.” She adds, “I’ve thought through what it means to raise children as a single parent, and I’m well aware that my children may face questions as they grow up. I’m prepared for that. I’m not a man-hater, and I don’t claim that living without a man is the ideal path. What I will teach my children is this: life is about love, about companionship, and about standing tall in your truth. They may not have a father, but they’ll grow up surrounded by strong, kind male figures — my brother, my cousins — who will give them the emotional balance that matters so much in childhood. I will teach them to speak for themselves, to walk with confidence, and to take pride in where they come from. My kids will grow up in a home filled with love, art, tradition, and culture. As an actor and dancer, I want to pass on the subtler graces of life — rhythm, resilience, and a deep sense of identity. I will love them with all my heart. They will have love, clarity and grow into complete, compassionate individuals. And soon, I will have two little souls who will call me amma, and that is enough.” ‘I DIDN’T CHOOSE THIS PATH AS AN ACT OF REBELLION’For Bhavana, the journey to motherhood brought into focus the societal biases against single mothers. She tells us, “A friend of mine was recently denied a rental home because she’s a single mother. She’s 50, and her son is 20. It’s heartbreaking that even now, women have to face judgment. Let me be clear — I didn’t choose this path as an act of rebellion. I’m not someone who goes against norms just to make a point. Had I found a partner, I would’ve walked the conventional road. But life didn’t pan out that way, and I still wanted to become a mother. That desire was valid — and powerful. If sharing my story can help even one woman feel less alone, I’ll consider that a victory.”