#BoysLockerRoom: How do we raise our children to respect both the sexes equally?

Unless you have been living under the rock, you must be aware of an Instagram account by the name ‘Bois lockerroom’, where a group of teenage boys shared images of women without their permission. Allegedly, the group was made exclusively to object and slut-shame girls (some of them even underage), morphe their pictures and pass vulgar comments.

The existence of the group came to light when one of the recently added members shared the screenshots of the lewd conversations which included casually talking about rape as well. Soon enough, these shocking screenshots took the social media platform by storm and as of now, a juvenile boy, from a respectable school in Delhi has been identified, along with 21 other members of the group.


Unsurprisingly, the whole #boyslockerroom incident has everyone on the internet seething with anger and frustration. For most people, it is a rude awakening how of the fact that this boy will be boys culture easily snowballs into rape culture. It is a mentality which is fed to our kids from the very beginning. These heinous screenshots actually lead to an honest question--how do we fix this mentality?

Parents, your actions matter more than your words
The whole divide between the ‘ladka’ and ‘ladki’ begins the day you ask your daughter to dress properly (avoiding shorts and midriff-baring clothes) in the presence of ‘uncles’ that visit home.

It begins the day you reprimand your daughter for dressing up and ask her to focus solely on her books when she is merely figuring out how to apply kajal. It also begins the day you chose to save for your daughter’s wedding and your son’s higher education. As parents, ‘HOW’ we treat our daughters will teach our sons much more about being a decent human being than those moral education classes ever will.

Correct other people’s questionable behaviour in front of your child
Pause the next time you are inclined towards sharing a sexist joke in a gathering. Pause before you laugh at one because it is ‘just a joke’. Remember, for your child, it is far more than a joke and is instead an example of how to treat the other gender. When you pull up someone over a gender-biased statement or rebuke inferior treatment of women in any manner, you teach your kid to stand up for what is right and not cave under peer pressure. Parents also need to monitor the other influences and mentors of their children and what they propagate about respecting both the genders equally.
Create zero-tolerance rules around sexism
Every time you hear your child demean, objectify or pass sexist comments about the other gender, it is your job to step up and educate them. It is also important to have fixed house rules in case such conversations occur. This will help in developing lasting beliefs in the equality of both the genders and a mentality of taking a stand when such conversations take place outside the home.
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