Why should we follow a deadline, ask girls

Girls say they are mature enough to know when is the right time to get back home, parents worry for their daughters for they feel Delhi is an unsafe city for women and dread the thought of their daughters becoming victims, boys understand their duty to drop off a girl home on time, but do feel that equality in our society is still lacking.
Here’s what they had to say...
Girls’ reactions
I don’t need a deadline
I don’t believe in deadlines as such, but in a city where I have no support system (I’m an outstation person here), I hardly venture out after 9pm. And if I’m late than that then I prefer to be in a large group, instead of being along on the streets.
- Lisa, 30, journalist
There should be no deadlines
I think there should be no deadlines set for an adult girl by others (be it her brother, mother, father, husband, partner, whoever). If at all a deadline has to be set, it should be set by the girl herself. If she is mature enough to go out and work/study, she is also mature enough to know what time she should get back home by. My deadline usually is 9pm - that’s when I come home from work.
- Priyanka Arora, 22, working with an MNC in Gurgaon
I come home by 2am and my parents understand that
My work is such that we are required to work round-the-clock, attend late night events, etc. So, it has become very regular for me to reach home by 1 or 2am. Even when I go out with my friends, I come back home by 2am. I live with my parents and they understand my work hours. If I’m out with my friends, my parents want me home by 1am, latest 2, but they make sure that my friends drop me or if it’s a shared cab with friends, they want at least one guy to be present till all the girls are dropped home.
- Meeta Anand, 25, PR professional
I have a deadline of 2am
It’s not justified. Someone in their late teens cannot be treated like kids. The murder was uncalled for. As college-goers, we are given enough freedom to venture out at night with our friends, you do not go clubbing in the afternoon. Me and my circle of friends get a deadline of about 2am generally.
- Nikita, 2nd year student, Maths Hons, Sri Venkateswara College
My parents are ok with me partying till 2am
My parents have no problem with me partying till 2am also. Parents need to understand that a girl and a boy can also be friends! They don’t always have to be in a relationship.
- Ananya Sharma, 18, student
Boyfriends
Girls should decide when they want to go out
My girlfriend and I go out all the time, sometimes at night and while she is with me, her parents do not complain. Women should have the freedom to walk out of the house any time they want and talk to whoever they feel like, just like men. If that’s not the case then equality in society is still pending.
- Shubham Bhatt, 22, working professional at a PR firm,
We get them home by midnight
Whenever I am out with my girlfriends, I ensure that they reach home by 10, if they are going alone. Or, if one of the guys is dropping the girls, we ensure that they reach home by midnight. The city is unsafe, what with cops themselves harassing younger people on the road at night. Why take a chance at all?
- Abhishek Sharma, 25, advertising professional
If partying alone, be back by 11pm
The cops are not completely irrational when they say that a girl shouldn’t go home alone at night in Delhi. So, whenever I am out with my girlfriend, I drop her back home by midnight because her parents are always worried about her safety. The days she works late, her family insists that she reaches home by 11pm, and I think that is a good and safe deadline for her to stick to.
- Gaurav Shukla, 28, IT professional
Midnight works for us
Once a month I party till midnight with my girlfriend and there is nothing wrong in it. For us, midnight works well! But yes, whenever we do that we make sure that are parents are aware of it. Their concern for our security is genuine. Occasions when I don’t tell them, I make sure I don’t do anything that might create a problem for me.
- Vikramjeet Singh Bhattal, Hindu College, 18
Parents
The deadline should be 9pm
The deadline for girls who travel alone should be 9pm - at that time, at least there will be other women using public transport. At 9ish, you still have people on the roads and it’s not that unsafe. But after that, there’s no one to ask for help too on the roads. Being independent is good, but it should not be confused with stupidity when it comes to venturing out alone.
- Shruti Sharma, 45
Driving alone is unsafe after 11pm
My daughter has been driving alone for the past couple of years and she is pretty confident. She also keeps a pepper spray with her and has taken self-defence classes too, so we know she will not be completely helpless when confronted with a situation. But even then, the deadline is 11pm - it’s not safe for any girl to be coming home alone after that.
- Harinder Singh Sodhi, 52
Her deadline is 9pm
My daughter has just started working a year ago, and even though she protests at time, my deadline for her is 9pm. Since she takes the metro and comes home, we cannot allow her to be out later than 9.30. The city is unsafe and we don’t want our daughter to become a victim. If she’s out with friends, then she can come back home by 11pm, provided someone drops her home.
- Kritika Dhingra, 42
My daughter fought for an 11pm deadline
I understand that girls may need to stay out late for work at times. But I also know it’s not safe. So, we’d set a deadline of 10pm for her initially, but she fought to get it changed to 11, which we’ve agreed to. On weekends, we allow her to come back home by midnight, but that is only when someone accompanies her. If she has to come alone, then 11 is the deadline.
- Nitin Kumar, 54