Rakhi bares all!

Rakhi Sawant���s ample bosom can no longer hide the grief.
The grief of being right royally ditched by her boyfriend and live-in partner of more than four years, Abhishek Awasthi. The in-your-face Rakhi, whose pelvic thrusts and pectoral heaves have frontbenchers hooting and the la-di-da scooting, is today in the throes of depression and admits to feeling suicidal and revengeful.
���He has destroyed me completely,��� she wails.So, what went wrong between the two? Rakhi blurts in between sobs, ���He just broke off and embraced another woman in his life. I invested my all in this affair. I hear he���s seeing newcomer, Shradha Sharma. She was also my good friend. But women are forever backstabbing their own kind. All this talk of sorority and sisterhood is total humbug. But Abhishek is going to cheat on her as well. That will be her comeuppance.���
Considering the two were quite an item, always seen together and appearing lovey-dovey at public dos, was it Rakhi���s success that made him insecure and threw him into the arms of another woman? ���He was a nobody. I made him. I established him in an industry which is unwelcoming of and hostile to newcomers. I went out of my way to put in a good word about him to anyone and everyone who mattered in the industry. I pleaded with producers to feature him in their videos. He used me as a launch pad, a stepping-stone to promote himself. When that was accomplished, he discarded me as one would a used tissue,��� she sobs.
This theme of being used, abused and then discarded has been a constant in Rakhi���s life. ���I have been very unlucky in love. I have never been loved. My father left us when I was very young. My mother only saw me as her golden goose. She couldn���t care less if I lived or died as long as she was getting her money.
For her, I was always the provider, never the daughter. When I told my mother for the first time I was in love with Abhishek, she threw a fit and threatened to commit suicide. She was scared that my money would go elsewhere. I bought a flat for her and I gave her huge sums of money, but she wanted to milk me till I was wrung dry. I have snapped all ties with her,��� says a distraught Rakhi.
While Rakhi can���t get over this break-up, she realises it wasn���t Abhishek���s fault alone. ���I made Abhishek a hero from zero and he turned out to be this ungrateful beast. But to say he alone was responsible for this is letting the other two culprits go scot-free. His mother and my mother were as instrumental in things coming to this pass. My mother was blinded by her unbridled greed while his mother had no problems with taking money from me and being indulged every time she came to Bombay as long I was securing a foothold for her son.
The day her son became someone in his own right, she dumped me saying she would get someone ���decent��� for him. She said she couldn���t bear to spoil her son���s reputation by getting him hitched to someone who bared her cleavage and exposed her midriffs,��� she says.
But doesn���t she think she fell victim to her perceived image, which is all bawdy, body and raunchy? ���I am really two persons. I gyrate, bump and grind to earn my livelihood. The other Rakhi is the quintessential Indian girl, steeped in Indian values. I do not drink, smoke, club or do drugs. At home, I am always in my nightgown.
Abhishek had an issue with my not drinking and saying no to partying and clubbing. He always said I was way too boring for him. Though I���m India���s J Lo, Beyonce and Silk Smitha, I had no hang-ups touching and washing his feet. I put him on a pedestal and I worshipped him. I was Tulsi personified in our relationship. But look where that has got me. I have been had by the three of them,��� she screams.
From the controversy surrounding the Mika lip lock, her ranting in Big Boss to details of her upbringing, Rakhi has always, intentionally or unwittingly, encouraged public scrutiny. Does she wish she hadn���t played out her life so much in the public realm?
Rakhi replies, ���I do not believe in keeping my past a secret from others. It is true I have had to make compromises from the age of 13 in order to fend for my family. I did a few things that are considered wrong from the moral angle but my God knows under what compulsions I had to resort to those moves. There is nothing to hide from the public. I am not very educated and I am from a very middle class background. Certain situations and circumstances in my life called for extraordinary measures. And while I may have regrets now, at the time I had very little else to fall back on. Today, Abhishek���s mother questions my decency. I feel like consuming poison and ending this humiliation. But I want to hang around to see God dispense justice.���
Through this entire trauma, Rakhi has still managed to do her bit for social causes. Apart from big donations to charitable organisations, she is also an activist when it comes to civic issues. ���I got the BMC to keep the road I live on garbage free and today, this road is unofficially known as the Rakhi Sawant Road,��� she chips in, sounding her peppy self for the first time. Her God, she says, tells her, ���Rakhi, I give you the money and you have to pay me my commission through helping the disadvantaged and the underprivileged.���
What about her forthcoming films? ���I am going to do an item number in Anees Jeeva���s Muthirai, where for the first time ever a number with two heroes (Nitin Sathya and Daniel Balaji) will be shot. I can guarantee this number will shake Chennaiites! Anees is a strong woman. She is helping me and I am helping her. I will be in Chennai on November 26. So, maybe some of you will catch me in action,��� she says, sounding now like the Rakhi we���ve always known. Other than this, Rakhi���s also doing a Yashraj film with Rani Mukherjee and Ranbir Kapoor.
But right now, the thing that has the best prospect of lifting her out of her blue world is the meeting with cricketer Kapil Dev. ���I am such a die hard fan of his. I am looking forward to discussing the ICL matches with him. And for sure, I���ll have him bowled over too,��� she exults.