Respecting each other’s space is the secret to Shilpa-Ganesh’s marriage

They’re looked at as one of those Sandalwood couples who are much in love by their peers. Shilpa and Ganesh have a special reason for Valentine’s week as their anniversary falls on February 11. The couple celebrated 10 year’s of marriage and togetherness. We caught up with them. Excerpts...
What do you love most about your spouse?
Ganesh: I cannot point out just one single thing that I find special or love about Shilpa. She does everything so well. She is a fantastic wife, a great mother and a loving wife. It is the fact that she is all of this that makes me love her.
Shilpa: I love it that he just lets me be. I think this is very important because it is because of this that I have been able to create my own identity. Usually, women who are married to stars end up being in the shawdows doing his work. I love how Ganesh has let me be and do what I want in that sense.
What’s the one thing that annoys you about the other, but is hard to change?
Ganesh: In the 24 hours of a day, for around five minutes daily there is a DTS surround sound at home. This is when Shilpa is angry or upset about something at home or elsewhere and she begins shouting. She basically wants things in order and something would have gone wrong which would have upset her.
Shilpa: I’ve realized one thing I cannot change about him is his instant reaction to everything. For 10 minutes, he just goes off reacting. I’ve realized I should just let the matter be and that’s the solution.
What’s the secret for your strong and smooth married life?
Ganesh: We have understood each other and are like friends. In our 24 hours, we respect each other’s space and give each other the personal time without intruding. When I am busy with my reading or films or she with her politics, we respect our work and stand by the other. This kind of understanding is important for a marriage — don’t control freedom.
Shilpa: I think mutual respect is what has got us going strong for 10 years. We both are clear of what we want and we give each other space to be that. He has let me do what I want without asking what or why, this is also the reason why I oblige to him too.
What’s one relationship advice you would give youngsters?
Ganesh: If you have loved somebody, don’t try to change them. There is a reason why you have loved someone and you need to respect that. If you try to change them, it affects the relationship.
Shilpa: Any relationship, not just romantic, needs a lot of time and space. Don’t judge and conclude anything hastily. Staying calm and composed gets you through everything.