Harsh truths about marriage that no one will tell you

If you look at the pictures married couples share on their social media handles, you will most probably end up believing that everyone has a perfect marriage. The vacations at exotic locations, birthday surprises and various display of public affection surely paint a pretty picture. But don’t be fooled by this apparently blatant display of happiness because there are hard truths about marriage they no one perhaps talk about. Here we have listed a few hard-to-believe insights about marriage, which perhaps would help readers to get past difficult stages in their married life.

If you ever feel dejected thinking there is no ‘unconditional love’ in your marriage, you aren’t alone. There is no need to feel depressed or worried believing something is wrong in your life. Most of the times couples have such ideal ideas of love, which cannot be possible in real life. Sometimes, people are married for years without being in love with each other. And it’s not uncommon.

It might sound a little harsh but a successful marriage requires a series of adjustments and compromises. After all it’s about two people sharing their lives for a lifetime and definitely, they would have to adjust to each other’s habits and expectations. But both the partners need to ensure that they don’t lose their individuality. Striking the right balance between adjustment and individuality is a difficult task, and not everyone would be ready to accept that.

Fights are an inevitable part of a married couple’s life. And when the fights get ugly, it’s not uncommon for couples to toy with the idea of a divorce. So, don’t be scared if your spouse threatens to break off all ties or don’t feel guilty if you ever catch yourself toying with the idea of getting a divorce after a nasty argument. It’s just the frustration or anger trying to get the better of you. And it happens to most married couples.

If you got married thinking that it would guarantee a lifetime of happiness, you are far from the truth. Marriage is just like any other relationship that has both good days and bad days. There will be laughter and love as well as fights and bitterness. While people would post pictures of their happy days, none would put up an image of their fights for the public to view, right? So, be prepared for both.

Do not panic if you feel being attracted to a third person. It’s quite normal, and take this as an opportunity to understand why this is happening to you. Is it because you aren’t getting attention from your spouse or your relationship is going through a rough patch? But do not let this attraction lead you to a path that you might repent later.

All marriages go through this phase of sexual slack. There will be times when you might not have sex with your spouse for weeks. There are so many factors—childbirth, hectic schedule, stress, fatigue, etc.—that affect the sexual life of a married couple.

It seems comparison and wrong expectations are the culprits behind most marriage-related problems. According to relationship experts, couples suffer from an acute sense of insecurity and unhappiness when they end up comparing their marriage with others. Remember, every relationship is unique and what you might be going through in your marriage may not be the same for someone else. The sooner you shed your preconceived notion about marriage, the easier it would be to adjust to the new life after tying the knot.

(All images used here are representational)