Signs you are being emotionally abused
Unfortunately, emotional abuse exists in some or the other form in 9 out of 10 households. Many spouses do not even realise that their partner is emotionally abusing them because there is a lot of manipulation involved. To help you understand whether you are experiencing this or not, here are some signs that are major red flags. In case you are, consult a counsellor, speak to someone trustworthy, communicate this to your partner and take a step back for your own sanity. If you are the abuser and you have been doing these things without realising, how about some self reflection?
You can’t make your own choices
This is the number one sign that you are being emotionally abused. If you feel that your partner is too vested in your social life, tells you how to talk, what not to do without acknowledging what you want, then you must read it as a red flag. You should have the freedom to make your own decisions. Even small comments are not done, unless you yourself know what you are doing is wrong.
Yells at you in front of others
No one has the right to disrespect you in front of others even if it is your or his parents. Partners do raise their voice but it should be occasional and not an everyday scenario. There are bound to be disagreements but this is when you both have to discuss your issues. Yelling is not at all productive and instead you end up spewing words of hatred towards each other. Also, it sort of creates a power imbalance. The one with a loud voice is heard and the other’s point is lost.
When one feels contempt for the other
In a healthy relationship, you are expected to be a good listener and be respectful towards your partner even if it is not reciprocated. If either of you is sarcastic with the other all the time, shows disgust or arrogance, then you must know that this is nothing but a barrier between you both that you are cementing.
Threatening each other
If either of you is in anyway threatening the other, you feel as if you are on the edge all the time with the person, the words “if, then” are muttered often, then you need to step back. This is a blackmail, a threat that can push you or your partner away and the fear that sets in, as per studies, has many a times lead to suicides.
You are defending yourself all the time
If you feel you have been defending yourself way too much and the positive communication is missing, you ought to take this sign as emotional abuse, Both of you should be able to talk openly with each other. You should not always be on guard or shield yourself with your partner.
The excessive blame game
In this game, the victim is made to feel as if he/she is wrong and that they deserve the wrath. This lowers the self confidence of the partner and the abuse continues because the victim starts believing that he/she is indeed the one in the wrong.
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