Can teacher-student be friends?

Exploring the changing dynamics within and beyond the classroom... Eight year old Shivanya Shah loves listing out her best friends. And topping the list is Mrs. Gonsalves, her English teacher.

"She is kind and funny, everyone in my class loves her," gushes this tiny tot. While this declaration may have raised eyebrows a few years ago, not anymore. The traditional drift between teachers and students is narrowing. "I have been teaching since 1973, and today I feel closer to them than ever. It is about sharing a common wavelength," opines sociologist and renowned academician Nandini Sardesai.

Professor Sudha Brahmbhatt, who has been teaching for 27 years, believes the shift in dynamics is a given. “It happens in every generation. It is a necessary result of changes in society,“ she explains.

Beyond the classroom
Students are forging unique relationships with their teachers, which extends outside the classroom. Meeting in neutral places helps the friendship flourish on an equal footing. "My college psychology teacher was extremely approachable and friendly. She often spent time with the class after college hours-catching up on a movie or simply hanging out. The traditional teacher mould didn't hold good here," smiles Shruti Joshi, a college-goer.Concurs Sardesai, "I may be strict in class, but am a close friend outside. Many students confide in me and freely talk about personal issues. The key is wanting to listen."

Despite the changing dynamics, remnants of the erstwhile guru-chela relationship remain. "Students do have innate respect for teachers, especially at the school level. They look up to us. It is for teachers to ensure that they do not break this trust," remarks Sardesai.

Old school
Of course, rigid old school beliefs are not dead. Certain academicians prefer to maintain a certain distance from their students. "Students may see me as stuffy, but I think being slightly aloof is healthy.I have seen that students start taking assignments and projects for granted when they know the teacher personally. Also, I find it difficult to mark my class objectively if I have immensely personal relationships with a select few," explains Dr Hitesh Somani, financial analyst and visiting faculty at several commerce colleges.

Adds a class X student, Jharna Vyas, "I have friends and I have teachers. The difference is very clear to me. Call me old fashioned, but I am not comfortable being in a backslapping relationship with a teacher. For me, it takes away from the sanctity of learning."

The teacher stereotype may be gradually changing, but it is a long way before the bound aries completely disappear."We must know where to draw the line. Ultimately, teachers and students can be friends, as long as they don't violate each other's space," signs off Brahmbhatt. Seems the (chalk) dust is yet to settle!