Bad parenting habits you must avoid making today

There are certain things a parent does inadvertently or in an attempt to improve their child's misbehaviour, which might have a negative impact on a child's psychology. Many of these things may not even appear to be so serious, but they have the potential to make children more prone to behavioural difficulties and mental health issues. Here are some bad parenting habits to avoid if you want to enhance your parenting skills and strengthen your child’s self esteem and confidence.

Most parents find it normal to call their kids with denominations like ‘brat’, ‘unworthy’, or ‘horrid’, also it may not even seem like a huge thing to you. But these labels do carry the potential of being disrespectful and send a harmful message at times. As when you project unconscious unpleasant thoughts onto your child in the form of some inappropriate tags, it makes children fearful of relying on their parents for care by mangling their ability to rely on others and ask for help, along with their self-esteem getting impacted as a result.

We simply use these extreme words for small things like “you never tie your laces properly,” or “you are always late,” but do you know that these words too have a psychological effect on a child’s self-esteem, motivation and well-being as it can lead your child to develop a fixed attitude or mindset towards things and their abilities, and however can even make them feel depressed or unhopeful about possible situations.

Are you that parent who compares his/her child’s abilities or achievements with any random kid next door, or say “You'll never be as brilliant as your brother”? By doing this, you are absolutely rejecting your child’s strengths and impairing their confidence to take up new skills or adventure. Each child is unique, maybe your child isn’t that great at maths as Guptaji’s son but he can be an expert in swimming or even in singing.

Discipline is a wonderful thing in itself, but parents should not instil it in their children in a way that undermines them. Blaming them for little infractions, punishing them, and shaming them in front of others can make them feel worthless and powerless.

Constant punishments and criticisms erode a child's self-esteem and, in many cases, their ability to live a satisfying life.

As a long-term parenting method, yelling or screaming is ineffective. Fear equals yelling, and fear is the antithesis of love. If you lose it on your kids very often, then try to determine the triggers or take space when required in order to regulate your own emotions. Rather than yelling, try to be heard in alternative ways. Learn to adjust your tone, as well as your face and body language, to appear less scary and more serious.

Parents frequently overlook the need of respecting a child's personal space. While children too require appropriate me-time to reflect and collect their ideas.

Everyone makes mistakes and fails in life, but that’s not a full stop. Kids, like every other being, learn from their mistakes, making them more confident and vigilant in the decision-making. Allow your children to enjoy their personal time, and if they make poor decisions, it will eventually mature them and prepare them to meet the problems that life throws at them. However, remember to be cautious and alert whenever you detect a threat or suspect that your child is being victimised by social or online bullying, abuse, or other forms of violence.

Being cold and unable to express your feelings may result in a controlling and unsettling environment for your child. Parents should try to be warm by telling their kids how much they love and care for them. Instead of creating a place where acceptance and affection are dependent on a person's behaviour, as this will destabilise your child and lead him/her to believe that your love and value for them is conditional on their attitude.