TV actress Meghna Raami on miscarriage, depression and motherhood: Are you incomplete without having kids?

TV actress Meghna Raami is quite happy in her space even if it has to fight the world to pronounce her perspective on pregnancy and motherhood. She doesn't shy away from talking her heart and this all-heart conversation with ETimes-TV is no exception. Excerpts...

After a miscarriage on the sets of a show during the initial days of our marriage, I was depressed for over 6 years. I stopped working at the peak of my career. I did nothing but wake up, eat and sleep. I developed an aversion towards pregnancy, work, the entertainment industry. I used to binge eat crazy loads of ice cream and biryani. I've become obese, yea.. 'fat and ugly' like some of them want to call (laughs). But not once did my husband question me about it or force me to work or do anything I didn't feel like. I'm forever indebted to him.

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Once on a TV show, Indra made two wishes - adopting kids and shedding weight. I couldn't fulfill the first one but promised to shed weight organically.

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I just wonder if the lives of people without kids are incomplete? Can't they ever find a meaning and purpose to life other than raising kids, securing their future, getting them married and slogging for grandchildren? There are a lot of other things to do in life.

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I've had many until very recently suggesting me to adopt kids or even go for surrogacy. But I politely replied that I don't want to go for any of them. It's a very personal choice not many can appreciate.

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After setting up the NGO, I felt why should I be a mother to only one when God has given me an opportunity to spread love. I chose to be a mother to many. If I had kids, my world would have been limited. At least that's what I believe and somehow this is very hard for this world to respect my perspective.

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I'm very fortunate enough to have the best mom and mother-in-law. My mom never questioned me about my choice. My mother-in-law apparently got to know about my miscarriage from a TV show. She broke into tears and called up my husband asking him why didn't I inform her and deal with the pain all alone. I'm absolutely blessed to have people who understand me and respect my emotions.

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I wonder if people like Vishnupriya and Siddharth ever exist. When they kept their newborn baby in my hands and my feelings were just beyond words. I mean who does that? I went home and asked Indra if we can do the same if we ever have kids.

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I somehow lose track of time when I sit with the elderly at old age homes. From complaining to making strange requests, they are no less than kids. I've so many children to take care of.

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When we often dub the narrative that motherhood is a woman's ultimate virture, why can't makers also feed this perspective that there is life even without kids? Why can't we have characters doing good and better in life even without kids?

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